A Good Fart Joke Makes Me Bawl

My Daughter Has Always Had A Strong Sense Of Her Own Identity. From The Day She Was Born Her Father And I Were In Love With And In Awe Of Her And Still Are.

I'm A Schizophrenic Mix Of Wannabe Glamourpuss And Absolute Slob, And My Style Is Very Much Magistrate-meets-barmaid.

I've Got A Hat Face. My Mother Always Said I've Got A Hat Face

I Am Best Viewed From A Distance.

Without Fake Tan I Have The Skin Tones Of A Dead Jellyfish.