A Junkie Will Steal Your Purse, And

It's A Great Day For America, Everybody! It's Monday, Woo.

I Try And Live My Life In Bite-size Chunks.

Saudia Arabia Takes In Half A Trillion Dollars Every Year In Oil Revenue, And The Country Has A Population Smaller Than New York State, But When Your System Of Government Is An Eleventh Century Monarchy, Someone's Going To End Up Poor, And It's Not Gonna Be The Guy Whose First Name Is King.

Twas The Night Before Thanksgiving. All The Food's In The Oven. And I'm In The Bedroom Performin' Self Lovin'.

They've Found A Link Between Chemicals In Shampoo And Obesity. If You're Eating Shampoo, Your Weight Is The Least Of Your Concerns.