All My Available Funds Are Completely Tied

How Is The Human Race Going To Survive Now That The Cost Of Living Has Gone Up Two Dollars A Quart?

I Am An Expert Of Electricity. My Father Occupied The Chair Of Applied Electricity At The State Prison.

Variant: I Was Driven To Drink By A Woman. I Am Forever Grateful, Yet I Never Had The Good Manners To Thank Her.

If There's A Will, Prosperity Can't Be Far Behind.

Few Things In Life Are More Embarrassing Than The Necessity Of Having To Inform An Old Friend That You Have Just Got Engaged To His Fiancee.