An Apple A Day Keeps Anyone Away,

If Our Founding Fathers Wanted Us To Care About The Rest Of The World, They Wouldn't Have Declared Their Independence From It.

Turn Up Your Hearing Aid 'grandpa', Because I'm Only Going To Say This Once!

Al Gore Has A Hit Movie Called 'an Inconvenient Truth.' I Have An Inconvenient Truth For Him: You're Still Not The President. ... This Past Weekend, Al Gore's Movie, 'an Inconvenient Truth,' Earned More Per Screen Than Any Film In The Country. ... I Dare Say Gore's Movie Is The Highest Grossing Powerpoint Presentation In History. ... Global Warming: Can We Live With It? ... It Is Time We Did Something, Namely Resign Ourselves To Doing Nothing [on Screen: Follow Congress' Lead]. ... For Instance, When Sea Levels Rise, We'll Just Build Levees [on Screen: Worked For New Orleans]

Mentioning Jesus In Your Speech: Small Government. Doing What Jesus Asked: Big Government.

I'll Make Fun Of Anybody. We're All About Falling Down And Going Boom On Camera.