Are There Glass Shards In My Anus?!

When Someone's Running Late Through An Airport, I Hope They Miss Their Flight So They Can Meet The Love Of Their Life At The Duty Free Shop.

Listening To Evanescence Makes Me Want To Break Up With A Girl In Real Time As A Giant Antique Hourglass Falls To The Floor In Slow Motion.

You Know Your Gut Instincts Are Spot On About A Person When You Can Also Detect A Water Source In The Soil Beneath Them.

I'm Willing To Write A Check For $10,000 If Someone Can Bring To Me What I Fell Is Ruining Thousands Of Lives, Destroying Lives Everyday. And I Know That You Know It's A Little Thing Called Chupacabra.

I Don't Know If I Could Rebuild An Airplane Engine, But I Know A Little Bit About Rotors And Rivets.