Automatic Simply Means That You Can?t Repair

The Best Way To Make Friends With An Audience Is To Make Them Laugh. You Don't Get People To Laugh Unless They Surrender - Surrender Their Defenses, Their Hostilities. And Once You Make An Audience Laugh, They're With You. And They Listen To You If You've Got Something To Say. I Have A Theory That If You Can Make Them Laugh, They're Your Friends.

The Oscar Is The Most Valuable, But Least Expensive, Item Of World-wide Public Relations Ever Invented By Any Industry.

I Happen To Think That Jesus Was The Greatest Hero Of All Time. I Don't Think You Could Invent That Kind Of A Hero. He Had It All - Everything That The Human Spirit Could Yearn For. There Is Nothing That Man Ever Said Or Did, By Word Or Deed That Is Evil. That Is Not Full Of Compassion. That Is Not Full Of Love For Your Neighbor Whether He's Down Or Out, Or Up - No Matter What. He Taught That You Must Love Your Neighbor Whether He's A Crook, A Beggar, Whether He's Rich Or Poor.

War To Me Is The Stupidest Way Of Settling Anything. The Whole Damn Thing Goes To Pieces.

If You Want To Send A Message, Try Western Union.