Bad English Was The Second Language Of

English Humor Resembles The Loch Ness Monster In That Both Are Famous But There Is A Strong Suspicion That Neither Exists.

The Country Has Always Been Governed By A Coalition But Today It Is Governed By A So-called Grand Coalition Which Is A More Polite Word For All And Sundry.

Rich People (in Australia) Have Swimming Pools In Their Gardens But, At Least, They Do Swim In Them.

In England It Is Bad Manners To Be Clever, To Assert Something Confidently. It May Be Your Own Personal View That Two And Two Make Four, But You Must Not State It In A Self-assured Way, Because This Is A Democratic Country And Others May Be Of A Different Opinion.

In England Only Uneducated People Show Off Their Knowledge; Nobody Quotes Latin Or Greek Authors In The Course Of Conversation, Unless He Has Never Read Them.