Being Offended Is Part Of Being In

My Daughter Is An Angel On Earth, So When I See Her It All Goes Away. I See Her And - Phew! - All That Dark Goes Away Pretty Much.

You Couldn’t Pay Me A Billion Dollars To Take Marijuana. I Don’t Really Like Coke Anymore. I’m Scared Of Ecstasy. The One Drug I'd Like To Try One Day Is Ayahuasca, Which Should Be Mandatory For Everybody. It’s Apparently This Crazy Tea That Gives You These Intense Hallucinations. Everyone Who Takes It Sees A Wise Old Black Man Who Takes You On A Wild Journey. I’m Not Going To Name Names, But Everyone Who Takes It Sees The Same Black Guy. I'm Not Kidding You. Everyone!

I Need The Gays At The Shows. If I Don't Have The Gays, I Just Go Nuts, Because They Always Know Every Word And They're The Best Core Audience You Can Have.

There's Even One For Your Titties. I Haven't Done The Boobs Mask One Yet-you Just Stick It On Your Tits, Apparently. I Have To Try It. But I Did The Foot One And The Hand One Yesterday, And It Makes My Skin Crazy. It's Like I Just Had Sex For Four Days.

If I See A Chick Playing Guitar, I'm Drawn To That Band Immediately. I Want To Know Everything, Even If It's Completely Electronic. But You Have To Really Get My Attention If You're Male. I Can't Help It. It's Part Of My Nature.