Calling A Taxi In Texas Is Like

Bread That Must Be Sliced With An Axe Is Bread That Is Too Nourishing.

The Good Thing About Being In Someone Else's Apartment Is It's So Much Easier To Leave Than It Is To Get Someone Out.

I've Done The Calculation And Your Chances Of Winning The Lottery Are Identical Whether You Play Or Not.

I Happen To Love A Good Run Almost As Much As Sex. Like Sex, There Are Often Times I Don't Think I'm Interested Until I'm Into It. Unlike Sex, I Do Have To Get Out Of Bed And Into The Elements. I Hate Leaving Bed.

There's No Such Thing As Advice To The Lovelorn. If They Took Advice, They Wouldn't Be Lovelorn.