Children Today Know More About Sex Than

Civilization Had Too Many Rules For Me, So I Did My Best To Rewrite Them.

I Am Certainly Not An Authority On Love Because There Are No Authorities On Love, Just Those Who've Had Luck With It And Those Who Haven't.

I Guess The Real Reason That My Wife And I Had Children Is The Same Reason That Napoleon Had For Invading Russia: It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time.

My Father Would Pass Gas And Then Blame It On Imaginary Animals.

There Is Hope For The Future Because God Has A Sense Of Humor And We Are Funny To God.