Ever Notice That Soup For One Is

You Know, If You Need 100 Rounds To Kill A Deer, Maybe Hunting Isn't Your Sport.

A Study Last Year Showed That The Page You Turn To First In The Newspaper Can Be A Predictor Of How Long You Will Live. No Surprise, Turning First To The Comics Pages Prolongs Your Life.

When The Sun Comes Up, I Have Morals Again.

Stand-up Is Like A Movie Every Night. You Write It, Direct It, Produce It, The Audience Votes, And You Go Home. There's Nothing More Satisfying.

I Pray If I Ever Find Out I Have Only About Three Minutes To Live It's During A Basketball Game, Because Then I'll Have, What, 10, 12 Years To Live?