Everything Beeps Now.

Death Is Caused By Swallowing Small Amounts Of Saliva Over A Long Period Of Time.

Why Is It Called Tourist Season If We Can't Shoot At Them?

I Never Eat Sushi. I Have Trouble Eating Things That Are Merely Unconscious.

Y'ever Notice How You Never Seem To Get Laid On Thanksgiving? I Think It's Because All The Coats Are On The Bed.

Governments Don't Want A Population Capable Of Critical Thinking, They Want Obedient Workers, People Just Smart Enough To Run The Machines And Just Dumb Enough To Passively Accept Their Situation.