Fang Will Be The First To Die

I Gave Him A Kick And He Stepped Back Onto The Third Rail. Exploding, Flaming Eraser! This Is Why Moms Tell You To Stay Away From The Third Rail, But It Sure Came In Handy This Time.

I Don't Know About The Rest Of You Who Have Little Voices, But Something About Mine Made Me Feel Completely Compelled To Listen To It.

What Are You Doing In There, Waxing Your Mustache?” Iggy Yelled, Pounding On The Bathroom Door. I Yanked The Door Open And Pushed Him Backward Hard, Making Him Stagger. “i Don’t Have A Mustache, You Idiot!” Iggy Giggled And Put His Arms Up To Protect Himself In Case I Punched Him. “and You Know What?” I Added. “you Don’t Have One Either. Well, Maybe In A Couple Years. You Can Always Hope.” I Left Him In The Hallway, Anxiously Fingering His Upper Lip.

If My Life Were A Corny Horror Movie, And The Heroine Was Lost And Alone, Trapped In An Underwater Cave, What Would Happen Next? If You Guessed, “she Drops Her Flashlight, And It Hits A Rock And Breaks, Leaving Her In Utter Darkness,” You Would Be Right. But I Bet You Didn’t Guess The Part About An Attack By A Giant Octopus.

A Vet! I Started Laughing Weakly And Had To Sit On The Edge Of The Tub. A Vet. Wait Till They Found Out How Appropriate That Was.