God Bless The American Spectator.

No, I Like You Alive And Warm And Wiggling.

You Just Don't Want A Vampire Pissed Off At You.

Eric,” She Said, “maybe Someday One Of The Waitresses Will Get Pregnant, And We Can Go To A Baby Shower!” “that Would Be Something To See,” Said Eric

The Vampire Is Not A Bad Man, And He Loves You

When You've Been Really Beaten, You Realize That You Are Just An Envelope Of Skin, An Easily Penetrated Envelope That Holds Together A Lot Of Fluids And Some Rigid Structures, Which In Their Turn Can Simply Be Broken And Invaded.