He Became An Officer And A Gentleman,

Good Lord! Who Can Account For The Fathomless Folly Of The Public?

One Half Of My Head, From The Top Of My Skull To The Cleft Of My Jaw, Hammers, Bangs, Sizzles While The Other Half, Serene And Content, Looks On At The Agony Next Door.

There's A Legion That Never Was 'listed, That Carries No Colours Or Crest, But, Split In A Thousand Detachments, Is Breaking The Road For The Rest.

Heaven Grant Us Patience With A Man In Love.

Ship Me Somewhere East Of Suez, Where The Best Is Like The Worst, Where There Aren't No Ten Commandments An' A Man Can Raisea Thirst.