Husband: A Man Who Buys His Football

Men Are Self-confident Because They Grow Up Identifying With Super-heroes. Women Have Bad Self-images Because They Grow Up Identifying With Barbie.

When I Was A Kid, I Had Two Friends, And They Were Imaginary And They Would Only Play With Each Other.

I Get So Happy When I Write A Joke. It's A Very Satisfying, Liberating Feeling.

Most Men Are Secretly Still Mad At Their Mothers For Throwing Away Their Comic Books. They Would Be Valuable Now.

Nobody Is Really Happy With What's On Their Head. People With Straight Hair Want Curly, People With Curly Want Straight, And Bald People Want Everyone To Be Blind.