I Am A Guy Who Talks About

Ireland Is A Place That's Beautiful And Interesting, But I Remember When I Went There As A Teenager With My Parents, I Was Like, "okay, I'll Go To Ireland With My Parents. It's Going To Be Green." I Think People Underestimate It, In That It's, "oh, It's Green," And Then You Get There, And It's Like, "wow, It Is Green!" It's, "oh, There's Irish Music," And Then You Get There, And You're Like, "oh, This Irish Music Is Amazing!" You Underestimate It.

"i Got Up Early Because I Wanted To." - Nobody

Now The Thanksgiving Meal Is Just So Unnecessarily Difficult. I Mean Even Mashed Potatoes - It's Like The Most Difficult Kind Of, You Know, Medieval Idea. All Right, Instead Of Just Cooking Them, Why Don't You Spend, Like, Eight Hours Peeling Them And Then We'll Have To Mash Them Up. It Feels Like Prison Labor, Really.

If Camping Is So Great, Why Are The Bugs Always Trying To Get In Your House?

In Indiana, I Wasn't Anything Special. But In New York, I've Gone Out With Girls With Purple Hair Who Go Out With Me Because I'm Exotic!