I Am A Guy Who Talks About

Every Now And Then I'll Read A Book, I'll Be So Proud Of Myself, I'll Try And Squeeze It Into Conversation. People Will Be Like, "hey Jim, How Ya Do-" "i Read A Book! Two Hundred And Fifty Pages!" "that's Great, What Was It About?" "no Idea! Took Me Three Years!"

How Dumb Do I Think The Americans Are? I Bet You We Could Sell Those Idiots Water.

You Never Want To Be The Worst Bowler Of The Group-because Then Everyone Treats You Like You Have Cancer. "you Can Do It! We're Praying For You." The Advice Starts. "use A Heavier Ball." "keep Your Arm Straight." "you Should Get A Vasectomy." If You're Really Bad At Bowling Like Me, They'll Ask If Want The Bumpers Up. Not That Bowling Is That Complex Anyway. "you Want The Bumpers? We Can Get Rid Of The Pins. Why Don't You Take This Coloring Book And Sit In The Corner?"

I Think When My Mother Died, It Was Such A - You Know, A Shock To The Logic That I Had Been Raised With.

Once You Identify Yourself As Believing Something, You Open Yourself To Ridicule.