I Applied To Uncyclopedia Bassists, And Was

Music Is For People. The Word 'pop' Is Simply Short For Popular. It Means That People Like It. I'm Just A Normal Jerk Who Happens To Make Music. As Long As My Brain And Fingers Work, I'm Cool.

You Know, Most People, They Want To Go To Hollywood. They Want To Be A Star. They Want To Be A Rock Star. That Thought Never Entered Any Of Our Minds, The Van Halen Family.

Music Kept Me Off The Streets And Out Of Trouble And Gave Me Something That Was Mine That No One Could Take Away From Me.

I Went To The Zoo One Day And Saw A Chimp Playing With A Beat-up Acoustic Guitar In A Way I Had Never Seen Before. Instead Of Using The Pick The Chimp Was Banging The Neck And Tapping It With Its Fingers. I Knew The Chimp Was On To Something So I Practiced This New Technique In My Room For Hours Until I'd Perfected It.

It Makes Me Feel Kind Of Weird, But Obviously The Man Upstairs Gave Me Something And It Touches People, And I'm Just So Blessed.