I Call Myself A 'domestic Goddess.

Sometimes For Me Not Throwing A Tantrum Is What Running A Marathon Or Swimming The English Channel Must Be Like For Others Of A Less-challenging Emotional Nature.

I Was Raised On Government Cheese. As An Adult, In My First Marriage, My Husband And I Worked Real Hard Just To Go Bankrupt. I Happened To Write Some Jokes About It. I Did Real Well For Myself.

You May Marry The Man Of Your Dreams, Ladies, But Fourteen Years Later You're Married To A Couch That Burps.

I Was Completely Nuts For Most Of My Life.

Everything Here Must Be Done Twice As No One Can Do It Right The First Time.