I'd Always Wanted To Write Books Ever

As A Lobbyist He Had Long Ago Concluded There Was No Difference In How Democrats And Republicans Conducted The Business Of Government. The Game Stayed The Same: It Was Always About Favors And Friends, And Who Controlled The Dough. Party Labels Were Merely A Way To Keep Track Of The Teams; Issues Were Mostly Smoke And Vaudeville. Nobody Believed In Anything Except Hanging On To Power, Whatever It Took.

That Dreadful Alligator Attack In Orlando Would Never Have Happened If Disney Had Put Up Real Warning Signs, Like Other Florida Resorts Do. But Wild Alligators Don't Fit The Disney Image, So They Were No Proper Warnings, And A Child Died For No Reason.

My Books Are Shelved In Different Places, Depending On The Bookstore. Sometimes They Can Be Found In The Mystery Section, Sometimes In The Humor Department, And Occasionally Even In The Literature Aisle, Which Is Somewhat Astounding.

Garcia Wondered Why People With Jesus Stickers On Their Bumper Always Drove Twenty Miles Per Hour Under The Speed Limit. If God Was My Co-pilot, He Thought, I'd Be Doing A Hundred And Twenty.

There's This False Notion That This Is A Regional Phenomenon, When In Fact Every State In The Union Has Hardcore Rednecks. No Exceptions.