I Deliver My Truth Hot And Hard.

Arbitrary Rules Teach Kids Discipline: If Every Rule Made Sense, They Wouldn't Be Learning Respect For Authority, They'd Be Learning Logic.

The Shamrock Is A Religious Symbol. St. Patrick Said The Leaves Represented The Trinity: The Father, The Son And The Holy Spirit. That's Why Four Leaf Clovers Are So Lucky, You Get A Bonus Jesus.

Look, Peta! If God Hadn't Wanted Us To Eat Animals, He Wouldn't Have Made Them So Darn Tasty!

You Can't Swallow And Think About Your Tongue. If You Think About Your Tongue, You've Got A Giant Piece Of Meat In Your Mouth And That's A Terrible Feeling.

I Have A Generally Liberal Audience, But They Will Applaud When I Nail A Liberal Lion.