I Do Jokes About What's Funny, And

The Thing That You're Faulted On Today Is Not That You Are Too Tough, Or Not That You Aren't Careful. It's That You Might Have Been Too Soft. People Want That Red Meat Now Because You Have To Keep Up With The Mood And The Mood Today Is Harsh. It Really Is.

The Way Money Goes So Fast These Days, They Should Paint Racing Stripes On It.

I'm Not Trying To Write A Bleak And Blistering Screed Against American Civilization. I'm Writing Something That I Hope Is Fun And Satirical And Full Of Possibility.

Being An Olympian Is The Ultimate Test Of One's Sporting Ability.

Young People, Take Heart: The Older You Get, The Fewer Commandments You Will Have The Strength To Break.