I Don't Recommend Being A Bachelor, But

... Chicago Divided Your Heart. Leaving You Loving The Joint For Keeps. Yet Knowing It Never Can Love You.

Watch For A Wild Boy Of No Particular Clan, Ready For Anything, Always Armed. Prefers Fighting To Toil, Drink To Fighting, Chasing Women To Booze Or Battle: May Attempt All Three Concurrently.

Never Lie Down With A Woman Who's Got More Troubles Than You.

And Never, Ever, No Matter What Else You Do In Your Whole Life, Never Sleep With Anyone Whose Troubles Are Worse Than Your Own.

I Don't Recommend Being A Bachelor, But It Helps If You Want To Write.