I Get Paid For What Most Kids

Don't Give Me Paper - I Can Get The Same Lawyer Who Drew It Up To Break It. But If You Shake My Hand, That's For Life.

Don't You Understand How Dramatic It Is To Be A Comic? To Be A Fool, To Get People To Laugh At This Show-off? Milton Berle Could Take Laurence Olivier And Stick Him Under The Table If He Wanted To. And So Could I.

I Never Got A Formal Education. So My Intellect Is My Common Sense. I Don't Have Anything Else Going For Me. And My Common Sense Opens The Door To Instinct.

I Have Some Very Personal Feelings About Politics, But I Don't Get Into It Because I Do Comedy Already.

When I Was Onstage Doing The Work, Adrenaline Killed The Pain Because I Never Hurt In Front Of An Audience.