I Hate It When My Hair Is

My Mom Is One Of Those Really Angry Moms Who Gets Mad At Absolutely Everything. Once When I Was A Little Kid, I Accidentally Knocked A Flintstones Glass Off The Kitchen Table. She Said, 'well, Dammit, We Can't Have Nice Things.'

I Confess That When I First Read That Smog Is Particularly Hazardous To Children, Senior Citizens, And Physically Active People, For A Brief Moment I Thought, “i’m In The Clear For At Least 10 More Years.”

I Love Key Lime Pie, Although It's Never Made The Proper Way.

I Don’t Believe For A Second That Weightlifting Is A Sport. They Pick Up A Heavy Thing And Put It Down Again. To Me, That’s Indecision.

I Used To Watch 'the Waltons' And Sob Because My Family Was Nothing Like That. We Had A Cruel Sense Of Humor In My Family.