I Have A Position Of Indirect Respect

If You're Wearing A Bluetooth Thing And You've Got That Thing On Your Belt, You Are Working For Somebody Else. You Are Not The Guy In Charge. That's A Really Good Social Status Indicator.

When I Did Comic Relief, I Did It To Be On The Show; It's A Badge Of Honor As A Comedian To Do That Show.

The Marines Was A Fresh Start - That Is Why They Shave Your Head. I Wish They Would Let You Change Your Name.

I Used To Go To The Cleveland Comedy Club All The Time. If There Was A Comic I Liked, I'd Go See Him Two Or Three Times That Week. Bob Saget Was One Of Those Guys.

I Love Las Vegas. I Like That Las Vegas Has Everything. Everything And Anything You Want To Do, You Can Do In Las Vegas.