I Like Living With Myself. I Mean

Thank You... Apple, For Adding A Camera To The Ipod Nano. Now It's Just Like The Iphone Except It Can't Make Calls. So Basically, It's Just Like The Iphone.

If You're Going To Do A Chris Christie Joke, Just Say, 'christie Spent $82,000 At A Concession Stand At Metlife Stadium. Then He Turned To His Friends And Said, 'you Guys Want Anything?'' That's A Joke. I Can't Believe It. I Caved In. I Feel Awful.

After Facing Backlash From Customers, Subway Says It Will Remove A Chemical In Its Bread That Is Also Found In Yoga Mats. Some People Were Like, 'you Mean I've Been Eating A Dangerous Chemical?' While Most People Were Like, 'you Mean I Can Eat My Yoga Mat?'

The Senate Came One Vote Short Of Granting Approval To Build The Keystone Pipeline. Democrats Say The Pipeline Could Accelerate Global Warming. Then People Who've Been Outside Today Said, 'sounds Good To Me. Let's Accelerate That Global Warming.'

Today Carly Fiorina Announced That She Is Running For President. Someone Else Bought 'carlyfiorina.org' And Posted 30,000 Sad Emoticons To Represent All The People She Laid Off At Hewlett-packard. I Haven't Seen That Many Sad, Blank Faces In One Place Since The Mayweather-pacquiao Fight.