I Love Fishing. It's Transcendental Meditation With

Don't Work Out, Work In.

Tread Gently On Anyone Who Looks At You Sideways.

So, Have You Heard About The Oyster Who Went To A Disco And Pulled A Mussel?

As Soon As I Got Successful, The Scottish Press Started Picking On Me. It's Something They Reserve Just For Me.

I'd Always Been Scared Of People With Tertiary Education And High Intellects In Case They Found Me Wanting. I Thought They Viewed Me As Just A Welder Who Knew A Few Jokes.