I'm Eighteen Years Behind In My Ironing.

Old Age Is When The Liver Spots Show Through Your Gloves.

I Hate Smart Sales Clerks. I Said To One, What Do You Have In Lingerie? She Says, More Than You'll Ever Have!

Remember There Is No Way You Can Give The Father Custody Of The Children Without Getting A Divorce.

Christmas Is A Time When Everybody Wants His Past Forgotten And His Present Remembered.

It's An Ill Will That Blows When You Leave The Hairdresser.