I'm Not An Impersonator. I've Only Got

I'm Happy To Report You Still Get Nothing You Don't Need At Motel 6, And, Therefore, You Don't Have To Pay For It. I Don't Need Valet Parking. If I Can Drive The Old Crate 300 Miles To The Hotel All By Myself, I Can Certainly Handle The Last Nine Feet To The Parking Space.

I'm Real. I Believe What I'm Saying. If Motel 6 Wasn't The Type Of Operation They Say It Is - And I Stay At Them When I Travel - I Wouldn't Do Their Commercials. That Comes Through On The Radio, And That's What It's All About.

The Difference Between An Optimist And A Pessimist? An Optimist Laughs To Forget, But A Pessimist Forgets To Laugh.

Somebody Says, 'do A Tom Bodett, A Folksy Kind Of Thing,' And It Sounds Like Something Out Of 'hee Haw,' Very Insulting. They Turn Wry Humor Into Disparaging Sarcasm, And You Get What Amounts To Insulting Advertising.

Like Most Alaska Immigrants, My Roots Continue To Petition For Equal Time.