I Never Invite Idiots To My House.

It Is Very Unreasonable Of People To Expect One Should Be At Home, Because One Is In The House. Of All Privileges, That Of Invisibility Is The Most Valuable.

Few People Know Anything Of The English History But What They Learn From Shakespear; For Our Story Is Rather A Tissue Of Personal Adventures And Catastrophes Than A Series Of Political Events.

Our Collection Of Men Is Very Antique, They Stand In My List Thus: A Man Of Sense, A Little Rusty, A Beau A Good Deal The Worse For Wearing, A Coxcomb Extremely Shattered, A Pretty Gentleman Very Insipid, A Baronet Very Solemn, A Squire Very Fat, A Fop Much Affected, A Barrister Learned In Coke Upon Littleton, But Who Knows Nothing Of `long Ways For Marry As Will', An Heir Apparent, Very Awkward; Which Of These Will Cast A Favourable Eye Upon Me I Don't Know.

To Judge Therefore Of Shakespeare By Aristotle's Rule Is Like Trying A Man By The Laws Of One Country Who Acted Under Those Of Another.

The Only Thing One Can Do One Day One Did Not Do The Day Before Is To Die.