I Once Truly Believed That If I

I Will Read Anything Rather Than Work.

People Only Call You 'my Dear' When They Are Irritated With You.

Years Ago When A Man Began To Notice That If He Stood Up On The Subway He Was Immediately Replaced By Two People, He Figured He Was Getting Too Fat.

I'm Tired Of All This Nonsense About Beauty Being Skin Deep. That's Deep Enough. What Do You Want, An Adorable Pancreas?

It Has Been Explained To Me That Toys Are Packaged In Shards, To Be Assembled By The Middle-aged And Butter-fingered, Because This Makes It Easier For The Shippers. ... If They Had To Spend Hours And Hours Putting Handlebars Onto Bicycles ... They Would Repent Their Ways And Deliver Something That Looked Like A Rocking Horse And Not Like The Result Of A Small Street Accident.