I Played Golf... I Did Not Get

I Like It When You Buy Something And Pay With A Credit Card, They Put Your Credit Card On The Receipt, But Only The Last Four Numbers. Aha! I'm Really Good At Guessing Twelve Numbers. I Can't Guess 16 Numbers, So Thanks For The Assistance!

I Hate Sandwiches At New York Delis. Too Much Meat On The Sandwich. It's Like A Cow With A Cracker On Either Side. "would You Like Anything Else With The Pastrami Sandwich?" "yeah, A Loaf Of Bread And Some Other People!"

I Went To A Cigar Store, The Man Behind The Counter Asked Me, "what Kind Of Cigars Do You Like?" I Answered, "it's A Boys."

Y'know, You Can't Please All The People All The Time... And Last Night, All Those People Were At My Show.

That Would Be Cool If The Earth's Crust Was Made Out Of Graham Cracker. It Would Disappear Just Like The Ozone Layer, But For Completely Different Reasons.