I Saw That Show, 50 Things To

I May Be Middle Class, But I'm Hard. 'al Dente', You Could Say.

If I'm At Home For The Weekend - And That Is Almost Never - I Tend To Get Twitchy At About Eight O'clock In The Evening Because My Body Clock Is Timed To Go On Stage. I Don't Know What To Do With Myself.

A Lady With A Clipboard Stopped Me In The Street The Other Day. She Said, 'can You Spare A Few Minutes For Cancer Research?' I Said, 'all Right, But We Won't Get Much Done.'

I Saw That Show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I Would Have Thought The Obvious One Was 'shout For Help'.

A Surprising Amount Of My Jokes Sound Very Implausible But Are True.