I Spent A Lot Of Time Waiting

Because, Ten-year-olds Of The World, You Shouldn't Believe What Your Teachers Tell You About The Beauty And Specialness And Uniqueness Of You. Or, Believe It, Little Snowflake, But Know It Won't Make A Bit Of Difference Until After Puberty. It's Newton's Lost Law: Anything That Makes You Unique Later Will Get Your Chocolate Milk Stolen And Your Eye Blackened As A Kid. Won't It, Sebastian? Oh, Yes, It Will, My Little Mandarin Chinese-learning, Poe-reciting, High-top-wearing Friend. God Bless You, Wherever You Are.

My Grandmother Was A Kind Of Scarsdale, New York, Society Woman, Best Known In Her Day As The Author Of The 1959 Book 'growing Your Own Way: An Informal Guide For Teen-agers' - This Despite Being A Person Whose Parenting Style Made Joan Crawford's Wire Hangers Look Like Pool Noodles.

I Have Definitely Had Experiences Where I Can Feel The Shift From Simply Living My Life To Being Slightly Outside Of My Life And Taking Notes.

Some Of The Writers I Admire Who Seem Very, Very Funny And Very Emotional To Me Can Develop A Closeness With The Reader Without Giving Too Much Of Themselves Away. Lorrie Moore Comes To Mind, As Does David Sedaris. When They Write, The Reader Thinks That They're Being Trusted As A Friend.

But Now My Problems Had Been Set Loose. They Could Be Anywhere At Any Time And I Was Just Like Everyone Else I Knew: Almost Positive That There Was Something Profoundly And Undiagnosably Wrong With Me.