I Still Don't Know How To Cook

I Love The Excess Of Christmas. The Shopping Season That Begins In September, The Bad Pop Star Recordings Of Christmas Carols, The Decorations That Don't Know When To Come Down.

Digital Television, Satellite Radio, Videogames, Ipods - So Much Media. Do Books Even Matter Anymore?

I'd Rather Call Myself A Mischief-maker, An Imp, Rather Than A Satirist. Satirist Sounds So Self Important. Plus No One Is Calling Himself An Imp Right Now. It Makes Me Feel Special.

Look, Not Embracing The 'today' Show Is Soooo Yesterday.

I'm In Fact A Hair Under Six Feet, But I'm Very Svelte. People Would Never See Me If I Turned Sideways.