I Think Mitt Romney Is A Symptom.

[obamacare] Was Going To Be The Republicans' Big Issue, And They're Not Talking About It Because It's Working.

I Think Capital Punishment Works Great. Every Killer You Kill Never Kills Again.

The Worst Years Of My Life Were The First Two Years I Was Doing Standup. You're Learning How To Do, And You're Going On Stage In Front Of Two Drunks And People Aren't Laughing And You're Broke. That's A Really Hard Time In Your Life.

Saying Someone Is Religious Is Heard In Most Of America As A Compliment, A Reassuring Affirmation That Someone Will Be Moral, Ethical, And After A Few Glasses Of Wine, A Freak In The Bedroom.

Who Takes Care Of Their People Better? Fema Or Hezbollah?