I Think People, For The Most Part,

I Think I Could Have A Funnier, More Economic Sets. But That's The Comedy I Do. And I Understand If People Aren't Interested In It And Would Rather Listen To Someone Else. But I'll Never Understand The Anger People Have Toward Me.

I'm Not A Centrist, And There's Nothing About Me That's Centrist. I Never Have Been.

What President Of The Airline Is Doing Is, He's Urging Everyone To Give Up Their Frequent Flyer Miles For Sick Kids... But As I Was Reading This, There Were Two Empty Seats Next To Me. Why Can't Sick Kids Sit There? If They're So Concerned With Sick Kids, Shouldn't They Have Like A Pen Of Sick Kids Next To The Gate?

I Would Say Just Stop Watching Me, I Guess, At This Point. That Is What I Do, And It Probably Is, In Some Way, A Bit Of A Lecture. I Can See How That's Not Something That Would Be Enticing For You To Watch In A Stand-up Hour.

Then I Will Tape The Sets And Even Though I`m Not Very Successful Sometimes I Will Try To Cut Out The Fat And Put The Jokes Closer Together.