I Try To Avoid Giving Advice.

You're Thinking I'm One Of Those Wise-ass California Vegetarians Who Is Going To Tell You That Eating A Few Strips Of Bacon Is Bad For Your Health. I'm Not. I Say Its A Free Country And You Should Be Able To Kill Yourself At Any Rate You Choose, As Long As Your Cold Dead Body Is Not Blocking My Driveway.

The Surest Way To Identify Those Who Won't Succeed At Weight Loss Is That They Tend To Say Things Like "my Goal Is To Lose Ten Pounds." Weight Targets Often Work In The Short Run. But If You Need Willpower To Keep The Weight Off, You're Doomed In The Long Run. The Only Way To Succeed In The Long Run Is By Using A System That Bypasses Your Need For Willpower.

In Less Enlightened Times, The Best Way To Impress Women Was To Own A Hot Car. But Women Wised Up And Realized It Was Better To Buy Their Own Hot Cars So They Wouldn't Have To Ride Around With Jerks.

Great Minds Don't Think Alike. If They Did, The Patent Office Would Only Have About Fifty Inventions.

Dinosaur: I Plan To Use Punctuated Equilibrium To Turn This Zit Into A Third Eye. Catbert: That's Not A Natural Advantage. You'd Better Stay Away From The Fitter Dinosaurs.