I Try To Avoid Giving Advice.

Dilbert: I'm Obsessed With Inventing A Perpetual Motion Machine. Most Scientists Think It's Impossible, But I Have Something They Don't. Dogbert: A Lot Of Spare Time? Dilbert: Exactly.

If I Liked Food And Disliked Exercise As Much As A 400 Pound Guy, I'd Be A 400 Pound Guy.

The Best Any Human Can Do Is To Pick A Delusion That Helps Him Get Through The Day. This Is Why People Of Different Religions Can Generally Live In Peace. At Some Level, We All Suspect That Other People Don't Believe Their Own Religion Any More Than We Believe Ours.

Computers And Rocket Ships Are Examples Of Invention, Not Of Understanding. ... All That Is Needed To Build Machines Is The Knowledge That When One Thing Happens, Another Thing Happens As A Result. It's An Accumulation Of Simple Patterns. A Dog Can Learn Patterns. There Is No "why&rdqo"; In Those Examples. We Don't Understand Why Electricity Travels. We Don't Know Why Light Travels At A Constant Speed Forever. All We Can Do Is Observe And Record Patterns.

I Believe Everybody In The World Should Have Guns. Citizens Should Have Bazookas And Rocket Launchers Too. I Believe That All Citizens Should Have Their Weapons Of Choice. However, I Also Believe That Only I Should Have The Ammunition. Because Frankly, I Wouldn't Trust The Rest Of The Goobers With Anything More Dangerous Than String.