I've Never Not Been Famous.

Keeping Up With The Joneses Was A Full-time Job With My Mother And Father. It Was Not Until Many Years Later When I Lived Alone That I Realized How Much Cheaper It Was To Drag The Joneses Down To My Level.

Life Was A Funny Thing That Happened To Me On The Way To The Grave.

There Is No Need To Do Any Housework At All. After The First Four Years The Dirt Doesn't Get Any Worse.

Many [hooligans] Discover To Their Shame That They Have Scruples; They Have Roots And, Greatest Disadvantage Of All, They Have Hope. The Fathers Superior Of The Order Do Not Try To Influence Their Children In Satan; They Merely Shake Their Heads In Sorrow. They Know That The Apostate Must Work Out His Own Damnation.

It's Been Agony But I Couldn't Have Done It Any Other Way.