I Want To Rob A Bank With

Rice Is Great If You're Really Hungry And Want To Eat Two Thousand Of Something.

Has Anyone Seen Me On Letterman? Two Million People Watch That Show And I Don't Know Where They Are. You Might Have Seen This Next Comedian On The Late Show, But I Think More People Have Seen Me At The Store. That Should Be My Introduction. "you Might Have Seen This Next Comedian At The Store," And People Would Say "hell Yes I Have!"

I Had My Palm Read. I Wrote Something On It First To See If She Would Read That Too.

My Fake Plants Died Because I Did Not Pretend To Water Them.

My Sister Wendy Has A Husband And Two Children, And They Have A Family Photo On Top Of The Vcr, Where They're All Looking Slightly To The Left. As Though Something Is Going On Over There! I Guess Something Happened Over To The Left That Made Everybody Happy! Except My Sister Is Cross-eyed, So She Can't Quite Pull It Off. One Eye Is Right-on.