'i Want To Touch People But If

I Wish People Used Wishes To Modify Themselves Instead Of Others. Wish To Be Low Maintenance. Wish To Be Autonomous, Even.

I Expect The Audience To Assume Tv Is Stupid. I Accept That It's My Job To Overcome It.

All [tv] Shows Are Like Cigarettes. You Watch Two, You Have A Higher Chance Of Watching Three. They're All Addictive.

Everything I Do, In The Middle Of It, I Lose All Objectivity. The Business Of Comedy Is Kind Of Ridiculous In That Respect. Your Job Is To Have A Lot Of Fun In A Jar, Then Sell It. There's Something Inherently Illogical And Impossible About That, But That Being Said, This Is As Good As It Gets.

I Feel Like My Life Has Always Been The 'hey Look At Me Show.' I'm Not Apologetic About That.