I Was Doing Comedy In Laundry Mats

Then It Was Snack Time, Right In The Middle Of Mass. Right Out Of Nowhere, The Priest Would Look Down And Say, 'let's Have Some Yum Yums!' You Would Get In Line - You Would Jump In The Line - And You Would Go Up And Get The Crouton O'christ.

It's An Incredible Feeling Falling In Love Someone Who Doesn't Know You Exist.

I Love Being On Stage If I'm Not On A Set. If I'm At Home, I'm Usually In My Office Editing Or Reconstructing My Website Or Whatever It May Be. I Just Love Putting Creativity Into A Performance.

I'm Quitting The Business Today. I'm Going To Open Up An Appliance Store, I've Always Really Been Into Toasters. I'm Giving It All Up.

I'm In A New Club, By The Way. And I Don't Know If You're First Timers Like I Am, But I'm In The 'i Just Dropped My Cell Phone In My Own Piss' Club. Have You Done That? Yeah, Good Times. I'm On The Phone And I Forget That I'm Using Shoulder Technique. Urinals Were Taken So I Went In To Use The Regular John. And As I'm Standing There, Mid-conversation, I'm Like 'are You Serious?' And It Just Started To Toboggan Right Down My Powerful Chest.