I Won All The Blue Ribbons For

I'm Trying To Lead A Good Christian Life, So There Ain't Too Much Spicy To Tell About Me.

Growing Up In Eastern Kentucky Like I Did, I'm Used To Having A Few Guns Around To Protect Me.

I Get Along With All The Women Singers, But Especially Dolly Parton. We Talk The Same Hillbilly Language.

If Anyone Asks How Old I Am, Tell Them It's None Of Their Business!

I'm Always Making Butcher Holler Sound Like The Most Backward Part Of The United States-and I Think Maybe It Is.