If I Didn't Want To Work For

My New Year's Eve Is Always 2 July, The Night Before My Birthday. That's The Night I Make My Resolutions. And This Year Scares The Life Out Of Me, Because No Matter How Successful, How Good Things Appear, There Is Always A Deep Core Of Failure Within Me, Although I Am Trying To Deal With It. My Biggest Fear, This Coming Year, Is That I Will Be Waking Up Alone. It Makes Me Wonder How Many Bodies Will Be Fished Out Of The Thames, How Many Decaying Corpses Will Be Found In One-room Flats. I'm Just Being Realistic.

Art Is Like A Lover Whom You Run Away From But Who Comes Back And Picks You Up.

They Grew Really Quickly. One Minute I Didn't Have Any Tits And The Next I Had The Biggest Tits In The World.

Have You Ever Longed For Someone So Much, So Deeply That You Thought You Would Die? That Your Heart Would Just Stop Beating? I Am Longing Now, But For Whom I Don't Know. My Whole Body Craves To Be Held. I Am Desperate To Love And Be Loved. I Want My Mind To Float Into Another's. I Want To Be Set Free From Despair By The Love I Feel For Another. I Want To Be Physically Part Of Someone Else. I Want To Be Joined. I Want To Be Open And Free To Explore Every Part Of Them, As Though I Were Exploring Myself.

The Words Went Round And Round And Round In My Mind And My Body, Until I Knew They Were No Longer My Words But Something That Had Been Carved Into My Heart. And Now My Soul Was Crying.