If I Had To Pick One Quality

One Of The Great Things About Being Ignorant Is That I Often Think My Ideas Are Original. It's A Wonderful Feeling. That's Why I Try To Avoid Any Knowledge That Would Spoil The Sensation. Sometimes It Isn't Easy. People Keep Hurling Knowledge At Me, And I Can't Always Duck.

I Try To Avoid Giving Advice.

Dilbert: It Took Weeks But I've Calculated A New Theory About The Origin Of The Universe. According To My Calculations It Didn't Start With A "big Bang" At All-it Was More Of "phhbwt" Sound. You May Be Wondering About The Practical Applications Of The "little Phhbwt" Theory. Dogbert: I Was Wondering When You'll Go Away.

Technology: No Place For Wimps!

In Less Enlightened Times, The Best Way To Impress Women Was To Own A Hot Car. But Women Wised Up And Realized It Was Better To Buy Their Own Hot Cars So They Wouldn't Have To Ride Around With Jerks.