If I Were The Last Person On

I Felt Ashamed For What I Had Done. I Don't Have Any Excuses. I Did What I Did. I Take Full Responsibility For Myself And My Actions. I Wouldn't Pawn This Off On Anybody. I'm Sorry It Happened. And I Hurt People.

My Mom Ate Every Piece Of Butter In The Midwest, She Lived Till She Was 90. And My Dad, He Smoked, He Drank - We Finally Just Had To Kill Him.

I Think What People Were Trying With Me Was To Figure Out Who I Was. They Thought I Was Funny, But They Were Like, "how Can We Use This Guy So He Can Regularly Do This?" Does That Make Any Sense? I Think People Were Trying To Figure Out If My Fat Peg Would Fit In Their Square Hole.

When I Say, 'i Can't Stay Long, I'm In-between Meals,' That Plays Differently On The Radio Than It Does In Person. So I Have To Pick Material That Works Because The Words Are Funny, Not Just Because Of The Images.

I'm A Big Game Show Fan. When You're A Poor Person, You Watch Game Shows. I Don't Think People Realize That. Maybe Everybody Watches Game Shows, But When You're Poor, You Live Vicariously Through Those People.