If We Were A Dog And God

I Think I Know Now Why We Are Occupying Iraq. In Case We Have To Sell America And Move To A Smaller Country.

For The First Time Since 1979, We Are Talking To The Islamic Republic Of Iran. Obama Says Talking To Him Is Probably Pointless, But It's A Hell Of A Relief From Mitch Mcconnell.

Since The Icelandic Volcano Obviously Needs A Virgin Sacrifice And The Catholic Church Obviously Needs New Leadership The Pope Must Volunteer To Jump In The Volcano. Pontiff, Don't Think Of It As Endorsing Paganism, Think Of It As Supersizing Ash Wednesday.

I Think Mitt Romney Is A Symptom. I Think The Problem Is The Republican Party.

I Can't Believe I'm Saying This, But Obama Looks Like He Does Need A Teleprompter.