If You Find Yourself Lost In The

When You Start Out In Comedy, Or Probably In A Lot Of Things, You Want It To Happen Fast. You Don't Want To See Yourself Having To Do This For Seven Years Before You Start To Get Some Feedback.

I Ate One Anchovy, And That Is Why I Did Not Eat Two Anchovies.

You Know When A Company Wants To Use Letters In Their Phone Number, But Often They'll Use Too Many Letters? "call 1-800-i-really-enjoy-brand-new-carpeting." Too Many Letters, Man, Must I Dial Them All? "hello? Hold On, Man, I'm Only On 'enjoy.' How Did You Know I Was Calling? You're Good, I Can See Why They Hired You!"

I Got My Hair Highlighted Because I Felt Some Strands Were More Important Than Others.

I'm Sick Of Soup Of The Day, Man. It's Time We Make A Decision. I Need To Know What Soup From Now On Is.